Wednesday, May 4, 2011

patriotically conflicted

on september 11, 2001, i was fortunate to not be downtown, but i vividly remember being in times square wondering if my location was the next area to be attacked? i remember watching fire trucks heading toward the towers on the west side highway to an uncertain future, while i waited on a two-hour line for a ferry to new jersey, to reunite with my brother and friends. i remember sitting with billy, stephanie and lou on sinatra drive in hoboken looking at what is now called ground zero, as it burned...our beautiful skyline became sad that day, never to be the same. i remember staying up all night watching the news while my brother slept on my couch because if the lincoln or holland tunnels were the next targets (as some were speculating at the time), their destruction would mean my first floor apartment would flood and we would need to get to higher ground immediately. i was profoundly sad, angry, scared and wished that that, in retaliation, as an act of war,we took out osama bin laden. now, nearly a decade later, bin laden's death, paired with the country's reaction has left me patriotically conflicted.

mark twain once wrote: "i've never wished a man dead, but i have read some obituaries with great pleasure." am i sorry bin laden is dead? no. will i mourn the death of a terrorist who murdered thousands of innocent people? absolutely not. after president obama gave his speech the other night, i found the coverage of the crowd outside the white house singing the national anthem very moving. for the first time since the days following september 11, the words took on more meaning than merely signaling the beginning of a baseball game. but quickly, it seemed to turn into a full on celebration of bin laden's death. it was sheer revelry...partying in the streets, toasting with liquor, applauding his death at national tv shows like the view.

i remember on september 11 and 12, 2001 watching news video of oversea "evil-doers" having similar celebrations in their streets over the tumbling of the twin towers, the destruction at the pentagon and the horror in pennsylvania and thinking, i can't believe those sons of bitches are celebrating! what kind of heartless people celebrate death? now, i can hear you saying: "but that's different, bin laden was evil and the people killed on 9/11 were innocent." that is true, i'm not arguing that point, but instead saying from a perception perspective...shouldn't we act better than them?

some of my friends have said that when they first heard bin laden was dead they felt exhilaration...not me. i felt a resurgence of fear. how long before they retaliate? where will that be? ny or dc again? maybe a smaller town? what about americans overseas? now, maybe it's the publicist in me, but in a time and age of instant communication, why would we want to taunt unstable terrorist type people with a celebration of their "leader's" death?

my point, and i do have one is...now more than ever, we should act like the civilized people we portray ourselves to be. is this how the supposed standard bearers of justice behave? according to jack cloonan, a former fbi special agent, my fears aren't unfounded. he told the huffington post "the reasons they hate us have not subsided and [these celebrations] could reinvigorate things."

nearly ten years later, the scars from september 11th still exist. some are public, like the gaping hole that to this day remains at ground zero…some less visible, like the continued pain felt by those who will forever mourn the loss of their fathers, mothers, sons, daughters, sisters, brothers and friends. many first responders are sick and dying from what they inhaled at the ground zero pile, fighting for health care they so desperately need. i personally think everyone lost a little bit of their innocence that day, i know i did.

as a proud native new yorker and american, i make no bones about hating bin laden as well as the people who fulfilled his vision. but celebrating nearly a decade later over our taking him out, just leaves me feeling uneasy. if we want to celebrate anything, how about instead we focus all our energy on celebrating and honoring our troop's heroism and bravery?

my friend marc posted a quote from dr. martin luther king jr. on his facebook wall that, i think expresses says what i feel more eloquently than i ever could: "i mourn the loss of thousands of precious lives, but I will not rejoice in the death of one, not even an enemy. returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that."

what's your point?

3 comments:

  1. I'm with you Robin. While I feel a sense of relief that he's gone I found the partying, USA chants, etc misplaced. Bin Laden is gone but the war on terror is not ending any time soon. Our troops are still fighting.

    Our country is still hated by many & I'm sure our reaction to his death did not help. I know that all of those families who lost loved one on Sept. 11 & in both Iraq & Afghanistan feel some relief & I'm glad for them. Just wish it could have been a time of reflection instead of brazen partying.

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  2. Robin, I am glad to read this post because I am happy to know you feel that way. I am not saying that what is right way to feel and think. Yet, since I do feel the same as you do, I am simply glad to know it. If I could recognise this news as good, it would be in future. At this moment I cannot guess know what the death would bring to us. But, if I know this action end the war, then I will probably be happy about his death. (If only his death could bring the peace.) I understand that many people were relieved by the news, but at the same time I feel sad watching those people celebrating the death. This also brought me a fear; the fear people justify their "murders"

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