Friday, January 21, 2011

a very un-"happy ending" (in so many ways)

ahhh vegas, the city littered with so many broken hearts and dreams. think you have heard them all? let me introduce you to young hubert blackman, who has filed a $1.8 million lawsuit against an escort service in vegas because one of their girls didn't spend enough time making him happy.

according to the las vegas times, while on vacation, this new york college student hired an escort from exclusive personals to come to his hotel room for a "date." while he was apparently satisfied with the quality of this woman's work, the quantity quickly became a point of contention.

here are the undisputed facts: the woman performed a lap dance (for $155) and a sex act (for another $120). the issue became the length of her "performance." hubert claims while she was commissioned for a one-hour period, she left after just 30 minutes. dissatisfied, he called the escort service to demand his money back (he also supposedly told them he had been too drunk at the time of the services to make an informed agreement with the dancer). needless to say, they said no (i'm guessing they said no while laughing hysterically, but i digress.)

so what did he do next? hubert did whatever sane thinking person does when the prostitution service they paid for isn't up to snuff, he called the cops! the vegas police promptly informed him that prostitution is illegal and that he could be arrested. (fun fact: while prostitution is indeed illegal in sin city, certain counties have legalized it, hence places like the bunny ranch being able to offer legal brothel service - sharing is caring.)

now before you think this story is over, let me remind you that hubert is a new yorker and a couple of no's won't stop us from seeking justice so richly deserved! upon returning to new york, he promptly filed a suit in manhattan criminal court, claiming he needed medical treatment for the clearly traumatic event, stating: "an escort did an illegal sexual act on me during her paid service to me...i almost had gotten arrested...i would like the court to close the business. i also would like to get my $275 payment back and a $1.8 million verdict for the tragic event that happened."

my point, and i do have one is...wow, hubert, the "tragic event" that happened is that you have now become a national laughing stock! so young and so stupid...so sad. my wish for hubert is that he forgets manhattan criminal court and instead brings the case before judge judy or the people's court so the rest of us see this case through with him!

what’s your point?

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